A buddy of mine has a twenty-something foot sailboat, and today was its first time in the water in two years. A fine time was had by all, but by the time we got back into harbor, I realized that at some point during the day, the SPF 30 sunblock I had applied had not done its job. Either that or I really have become a vampire.
The tops of my knees match my forearms, which in turn blend seamlessly into the backs of my hands, the skin on which bear a striking resemblance to my cheeks and nose.
The color of the day, of course, is red. We're not talking pink. We're not even talking crayola red. We're talking nine coats of candy apple red with a couple layers of clearcoat on top. My arms look like the face of a man who's in the middle of a vein twitching, breath holding, steam shooting out the ears, Fritz Freling-esque conniption fit.
If that wasn't enough, I managed to slice the bottom of my foot in 12 places on some rocks while putting the boat back on the trailer. Yeah, that's salt water folks. That felt fantastic.