Chrestomathy
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Wednesday, July 18 2018 @ 09:13 PM PDT
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 A joke Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Monday, September 05 2005 @ 06:32 PM PDT
 Viewed:  868 times  
KitschThe winner of the Ship of Fools most offensive religious joke contest:


A little girl is standing on top of a cliff, looking down at the sea and crying her eyes out. A priest approaches and says, "My child, why are you so upset?"

The little girl turns to him and says, "My mummy and daddy were in their car -- and it just rolled over the cliff and smashed on the rocks down there."

The priest slowly looks around him while unbuttoning his cassock and says, "It's just not your day, is it?"

 You can't make this stuff up Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Friday, May 06 2005 @ 06:42 PM PDT
 Viewed:  743 times  
KitschChlamydia outbreak kills a dozen penguins

Let me be the first to say, they didn't get it from me. I've never been to the San Francisco Zoo.

What's next syphilitic llamas? (If so, that wasn't me either.)

 Royally Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Friday, April 15 2005 @ 07:01 PM PDT
 Viewed:  839 times  
KitschDon't ask me how I got on the subject, because I honestly don't even remember, but I found out a few interesting things about my lineage today.

As it turns out, my mother's father's family has been in America almost as long as you can be and still be a colonist. Francois Girouard and his wife Jeanne-Anne (Aucoin) arrived at Port Royal, in the french colony of Acadia sometime around 1645. I had already known a bit about the family history in Acadia - for example, that a lot of family members made their way down to Louisiana after LaSalle claimed it for France (as an aside, the word "Cajun" comes directly from the word "Acadian". Just say "Acadian" with a New England accent a few times fast - it'll become obvious.) What I guess I never realized was just how early that was all going on. Another thing I never realized is that a distant cousin of mine has already done the work for me - He wrote a series of five books detailing the Girouard family that I think I feel obligated to buy.

On the other end of things, I read a reasonably convincing argument that about 1100 years ago, one of my other ancestors was the High King of Ireland. Weird, eh?

 Be afraid Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Wednesday, April 13 2005 @ 12:31 AM PDT
 Viewed:  768 times  
KitschWhen a hard drive company resorts to a three minute flash movie in the style of a poorly done Schoolhouse Rock episode to explain its new drive platter technology, we're all in trouble.

No, really.

 Unabashed cynicism Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Monday, April 11 2005 @ 07:20 PM PDT
 Viewed:  848 times  
KitschThis may be the single most cynical thing I have ever laid eyes on. It's just wrong on so many levels.

I laughed so hard I think I peed a little.

 A theme Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Friday, March 04 2005 @ 11:04 PM PST
 Viewed:  819 times  
Kitsch...or two. I finally added a couple of themes that I made ages and ages ago, but until now weren't compatible with the software I'm using.

Overall, they're pretty crappy, but there's novelty to be had.

"Burly" and "NiteGlo" are new. There may be bugs in them. Let me know if you run across one.

 In other news... Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Wednesday, January 12 2005 @ 01:36 AM PST
 Viewed:  752 times  
KitschThis gave me a good chuckle.
This made me damp.

 Dear PTO, Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Tuesday, January 11 2005 @ 05:23 PM PST
 Viewed:  622 times  
KitschUm... Good job, guys.

 Happy new year Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Friday, December 31 2004 @ 04:38 PM PST
 Viewed:  742 times  
Kitsch
(Click for bigger, possibly not safe for work)

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Most Recent Post: 12/31 05:04PM by Dan4th

 Yes, Virginia... Email Article To a Friend View Printable Version 
 Author:  matt
 Dated:  Saturday, December 25 2004 @ 11:19 PM PST
 Viewed:  686 times  
Kitsch...there is a Santa Claus.
...there is a Cthulhu.
...cliches abound.

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Buy an overpriced, marginally clever shirt and help support my sanity. [how?]

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